The Daily Uplift
Posted on February 25, 2009. Filed under: funny, humor, random, self-awareness | Tags: bizarre, family, funny, humor, relationships, self improvement, self-awareness |
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ZimmyFebruary 28, 2009
Damn, he should’ve just let natural selection work its magic.
CSRFebruary 28, 2009
oh. geez. bwahahahahahaha…
JanaFebruary 28, 2009
wtfFebruary 28, 2009
Someone should submit this to failblog.
Hannah F.February 28, 2009
Ok, ok, I’ve heard of people mistaking the asshole, but at least they had it in a hole! What was he doing? Aiming for her taint?
Seriously, how do people like this get through life?
tooshortFebruary 28, 2009
those people really shouldn’t pro-create.
AlannaFebruary 28, 2009
I live just a few minutes from Bloomsburg…and, sadly, this kind of hickish stupidity is only the tip of the iceberg.
MLFebruary 28, 2009
Perhaps…telling them how to breed was the ACTUAL mistake here.
EddyMarch 1, 2009
The following comment was moderated for your convenience:
man, there’s breast intercourse so why not thigh-intercourse? Come to think of it, that seems like just about the next best thing to real sex.
FYI I inserted intercourse and breast where other potentially offensive words were used. actually I liked it the other way but I wanted to be considerate.
anonMarch 1, 2009
This is what happens when you make sex taboo in a society. Poor bastard had clearly never seen a porn flick before.
Also a good case for comprehensive sex-ed.
JadeMarch 1, 2009
This is priceless.
Somebody needs a lesson!
ymtsMarch 1, 2009
They’re too damn old to breed anyways, At least the woman is anyways.
NickMarch 1, 2009
Well…damn. And I thought I knew some dumb people. Apparently not haha.
brittyMarch 1, 2009
this came from the town where I graduated college from. Im full of school pride right now. 4 years right down the drain.
ZachMarch 1, 2009
Wow, this is actually an article from my home news paper. I would like to point out that this paper tends to make people sound a lot more stupid than they really are. You often find outrageous articles like this in this paper.
KeithMarch 1, 2009
Well I suppose if she’s a hefty woman/he’s a little guy he could get confused with the fat creases. Maybe.
Burt ReynoldsMarch 1, 2009
Uh…how did she NOT know that something wasn’t right? Him I could understand…kind of…but her? There’s a very clear difference between your thighs and your vajay. The only explanation I can come up with is that she’s enormous and he’s REALLY small in the pants.
Slater9292March 1, 2009
I imagine they were Jesus freaks.
TimMarch 1, 2009
gertrudeMarch 1, 2009
Woman’s fault. First, she should OPEN her legs, not keep them closed. Second, she’s probably quite large and therefore is one of those girls that HAS TO HAVE the lights out and the covers over everything. Some women just have to complicate everything
Turd FergusonMarch 1, 2009
if a girl wanted me to nail her between the thighs (literally), I would.
anonymousMarch 1, 2009
Please tell me that IS real.
Thanks for the laugh
LeMelonMarch 1, 2009
It’s not just one complete idiot not knowing what to do, it’s two. And who says opposites attract!
mattblackallMarch 1, 2009
LOL it’s definitely real too as i subscribe to the newspaper that this is in.
peterMarch 1, 2009
Reason No. 2398 Not to Wait Until Marriage
CalebMarch 1, 2009
OK…EITHER HES JUST A MORON, OR HIS DICK IS SO SMALL SHE CANT TELL IF ITS INSIDE HER OR NOT….WTF…KILL YOURSELF…
jokerjay76March 1, 2009
oh my God
farewwMarch 1, 2009
Apparently Obama finally figured out how to do it. Perhaps the doctor put a teleprompter in Obama’s bedroom so Dumbama could follow its directions.
SteveMarch 2, 2009
BenMarch 2, 2009
ROFLMAO at these comments. The comments made the actual post even more hilarious.
desertorchidMarch 2, 2009
Oh Dear…seriously???? nyahahahahahaha :0
shannen143March 2, 2009
… Seriously…? The wife didn’t know what / where HER genitalia was?
moonlitundergroundMarch 2, 2009
3continentfamilyMarch 2, 2009
OMG! Unbelievable. LOl!
Vikas GuptaMarch 2, 2009
It’s not only amazing that there are actually people this unbelievably unintelligent in our society but also the fact that they are in any way permitted to pro-create. The product of life stemming from these two would surely contribute great things to our world.
IntelligenceMarch 2, 2009
Nice One Steve!
I can’t believe we elected a president with such a horrible name. It’s so easy to make fun of. Dumbama, Stupidama, Idiotama, Moronobama, Alabama, the list goes on and on. Hopefully he’ll misread the teleprompter someday and say something Dumbama enough that we can just impeach him.
Joe WheelerMarch 2, 2009
I read about a worried couple where the husband had been penetrating the wife in her naval, and she was not able to conceive.
~uh~™March 2, 2009
At least here is no direct evidence that these people were members of a Republican sub-committee.
Brian Patrick CorkMarch 2, 2009
maybe they shouldn’t have been allowed to breed….there are just somethings that shouldn’t be fixed.
rachelMarch 2, 2009
People like this shouldn’t breed it goes against the concept of natural selection. Imagine the look on his face when he finally got it right.
ravelerMarch 2, 2009
were they cousins by any chance
JamesMarch 2, 2009
Steve you’re so funny!
Joe Dirt Four WheelerMarch 2, 2009
Haha oh wow, I can’t believe this ended up on the internet. Sadly I live in Bloomsburg
John GirtonMarch 2, 2009
ravelers comment “Imagine the look on his face when he finally got it right.” is the best!
PaulMarch 3, 2009
I read a story about a couple that both experienced terrible pain and difficulty in coitus. The Dr. they consulted asked some questions and discovered they were attempting to use the woman’s urethra for sex (arguably, pain or not the man must have been veeeery small for this to be possible in any way.)
DavidMarch 3, 2009
haha reminds me of Idiocracy. Great Movie.
JasonMarch 4, 2009
People are quite right, this pair really should have been let slip into blisful extinction…
sarsen56March 5, 2009
i bet he was catholic
noobMarch 5, 2009
Steve, don’t be bitter just because they wrote an article about you and your wife. If the election had gone the other way, I wouldn’t be making ‘funny jokes’ about McLame… Dur!
DpwnShiftMarch 5, 2009
Thanks man.But you have to put in your mind that ` doing mistakes in life is what proves that your a human being’.Keep it up.
s00092243March 6, 2009
Funny. That’s not what your wife, sister and mom said about me.
SteveMarch 6, 2009
OGDMarch 6, 2009
That must have been some really boring sex for her…
JessicaMarch 8, 2009
“This couple should not breed.”
Don’t worry. They won’t.
JonathanMarch 9, 2009
??? Really ??? How the hell?
AmbroseMarch 9, 2009
See, this is why abstinence-only sex education isn’t a good thing. If nobody learns how to properly have sex, then everybody’s going to turn out as dumb as these two.
JeffMarch 10, 2009
Man i know when he finally got up in it…he quit his job, stopped all his hobbies, and just sat in bed all day SMASHIN!
mister wilsonMarch 10, 2009
That is just pathetic. Guys like this do not deserve to even get a hard-on. Check out the latest wonkery and douchebaggery at twobigboobs.wordpress.com
We love to criticize politicians, comedians, famous or not…if you’re stupid, we’ll take you on at Two Big Boobs Blog
twobigboobsMarch 11, 2009
Why did the wife not say anything! Was he so small that she couldn’t tell?! WoW!
LisaMarch 12, 2009
Why did the doc set him straight? Now he’s
going to reproduce. Eek
electronic cigarettesMarch 12, 2009
That is really special, I with the Doc hadn’t straightened them out, I don’t think we want them reproducing.
Bec ThomasMarch 17, 2009
Rather stupid of everyone saying “This is why you need practice!”
Everyone has a first time, whether they wait until they’re married or not. I’m one of those “idiots” waiting for marriage, but these people are not “unpracticed”: they are stupid. Simple.
DaveMarch 19, 2009
Well that just goes to prove the old theory that if your parents didn’t have any children, chances are you won’t either!
FramtonmApril 1, 2009
if it feels good it feels good
feelgoodhitApril 20, 2009
ha ha i think that’s the funniest thing I’ve read all day
E CigaretteJanuary 7, 2010
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